ADVICE

Mental health: Accepting flaws is key to being truly happy

Why it's so important to accept our flaws

Obsessing about the failures of yesterday is self-defeating.

We have all made mistakes, wrong choices and bad decisions.

We can make excuses for the past, apportion blame, accept responsibility but no amount of effort or energy can alter history.

The best we can hope for is that we learn from our history; that what has been can be used to help plan for what is to come; that mistakes become opportunities for retakes.

But fear of the future can also be self-defeating.

We know that we had a yesterday.

We can merely hope that we have a tomorrow.

The very best we have is today...this hour, this minute...our next breath.

An action taken or a decision made in the next 30 seconds can change the course of our life.

We should appreciate the importance of today.

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This day is our certainty. It's our reality and it's ours to do with what we choose.

If we strive to make each and every day our best, happiest and most enjoyable day possible then that is the direction our life will take.

But we must accept that absolute perfection is unattainable.

We are flawed. Those around us are flawed.

Acceptance and effort are two ways to deal with stress and anxiety.

It's a solo quest for happiness and fulfilment.

No-one else can do it for us.

  • Gary Bentley is a Rural Aid counsellor